One life to live, just this one. Its not worth it to lose myself in the madness of thoughts, emotions and feelings. I mean, WTF, at times I allow myself to get lost in my mind for hours if not days. As if, I am possessed by something, a thought pattern or an emotional construct like anger/jealousy will completely takeover me, and I become a total zombie in those hours/days.
Why am I doing this to myself? Why am I allowing such things to takeover me ? Bit of selfinvestigation tells me, that i am addicted to be ’emotional’, or ‘angry’, those are states i am addicted to. I love to be angry. I love to be worrisome etc etc. When I am in one of those brutal self-torturing states, even the fucking God cannot rescue me, but there is one power who can stop it: that is ME.
Yes I am the most powerful being in this universe as far as I am concerned, because only I have the POWER to stop myself from my madness of thoughts, emotions, and feelings. I am my sanity maker, I am own self-healer, I am my own life-giver, because only I can stop my mind from its madness.
Till here no further:
When and as I see myself going into accusations, I realize it is a pattern, hence, I stop it then and there. I realize if I allow myself to participate in such thoughts, soon I will fuck myself so bad, only God knows what disaster will happen.
When and as I see myself going into thoughts of blaming another, I see it as mind pattern for which i am addicted to, then i stop it right there. I breathe, I become physical, I stay here.
In that way, i support myself to remain here, not allow myself to fuck myself with my mind.
God, this one last life to live, just one life, soon it will be all over, so why the fuck do i allow myself to run with my mind? My thoughts, emotions and feelings will only bring disaster.
So till here no further, i stop myself from creating the drama of mental, emotional story making.
I am here, I breathe.
I am the only power in this universe, who can stop the madness of my mind, there is no other.
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