Day 71 – Ranking people so that I can always win

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be competitive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always want to win at any cost.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to win.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to win and it is not about just winning, its more about defeating others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to win and desire to defeat others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize I desire to defeat others more so than actually win, winning is a less thrill than actually defeating others. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rank people, placing people in order of importance so that I can assure to win always and some will always be defeated. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rank people because it makes defeating others easier and sucking upto some easier. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the game of ranking people is super ego game, which is all about defeating people, so that I can be the winner. 

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not realize placing some as more important than others is a survival ego trick, because ego sees benefits, advantage, disadvantage in the game of survival we call life. 

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see some as closer to me and others as strangers, another game that helps me survive. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suck up to high ranked people and demoralize the low rank people because I know the return is high when I suck upto high rank people. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to play the game of ranking all to make some relationships more important than others so that I can gain more joy. its all about me been happy and elated. I realize living here as breath, seen all as equals, and directing any point from a common sense way is the way. no need to rank, no need place some high and some low, In breathing I am here as life hence I am equal to all, one and equal. As I stand with life, not with any person or personality, and directing myself to do what is best for LIFE.

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