Day 175 – Nobody is listening to my internal conversations. Thinking is insane.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, when I think shit about other people, I am actually carrying shit about them inside my mind and possibly will experience shit in my relationship with them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, carrying thoughts about others in my head in the start of experiencing shit in my relationship with others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, the simplest solution to peaceful living is to stop thinking shit about others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, once the thinking thoughts about others starts, it accumulates, the energy of it will create outflows.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, start of any bad relationship can be traced back to thoughts which I casually entertained about others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, a living being does not think, at least does not think shit compulsively.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, as I think, I accumulate energy and it will manifest consequences accordingly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, thought by thought a mountain of energy can build up leading to unexpected outbursts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, the key is the breathe and stop participating in thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, I am addicted to thinking, just that one thought, just that one nasty imagination, just that one bitter memory, just that one spiteful comment, just that one more blame so that I can feel better. in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, I have an addiction problem, addicted to thinking. Just one more time, Just one more thought, is the excuse to keep on thinking, mostly shit about others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, there is no way through thinking, there is no light at the end of the tunnel of thinking, there is no salvation in thinking. Communication, talking, listening, writing, planning, doing, on the other hand, are ways to get things done, instead of just thinking and hoping that others are listening to my internal conversations. In fact nobody is listening to me, I am just silently blabbering to myself, which is called thinking.

When and as I see myself to blabbering to myself, just thinking away, I stop, I breathe, I see/realize/understand, that all I am doing is making noise inside my head, within my grey matter, nobody is listening, no actually communication is going on, it just mental noise, therefore I stop, I breathe, and I direct myself to actually engage in real, actual, physical acts of communication, speaking, talking, listening, writing, planning etc, instead of just being stuck in the mind world.

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Day 174 – Before blaming, place yourself in the shoes of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, I have not placed myself in the shoes of another before I charge them or blame them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, I have not considered others before I charge them or blame them, while only look at my self-interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, others are me in another life, equal and one, I could have easily be walking in their shoes, it just my allocation point gave me a different experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, if I place myself in the shoes of another, I will see/realize/understand their starting point, what they have been through in their life path, before I adamantly judge them or blame them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, LIFE is equal and one, as every being is LIFE, and I am LIFE, therefore by simple deduction I see that I am in fact every being. in this I forgive me for living the self-interest but not the LIFE-interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, the simplest solution to LIFE-interest living is doing what is best for all moment by moment. In any simple momentary situation, considering what is BEST for ALL is the key to LIFE-interest living, whereas self-interest living is only considering ME.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, blame is self-interest where it seeks to point the finger at others while not taking responsibility within self. In this I forgive me for not realizing, the key is to bring any point back to myself, my participation in it, my creation of it. Who am I, what I accept and allow is the key.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, desire, want, craving, possession, greed are all self-interest, while breathing here as the physical is LIFE-interest, living as life as breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, I have to bring all the points back to myself, self first, before I charge others with blame or judgement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, it is a great self-responsibility to breathe and remain here because allowing and accepting blame is just that, pointing the finger at others while hiding my self-dishonesty within.  In this I see/realize/understand, its time for real brutal self honesty. Am I living in the interest of LIFE or in self-interest?

When and as I see myself blaming, charging, pointing the finger at others, I stop, I breathe, I realize whatever the evils I see in others in fact exist in me that I am avoiding to see. Blame is self-irresponsible, whereas taking the same within and looking at myself, how I created it, how I participate in it, will assist me much to overcome it.

When and as I see myself making judgements or blames, I stop, I breathe, I place myself in the shoes of another to understand their situation, in this I support myself and others, after all, LIFE is equal and ONE, what I do to another, I do unto myself.

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