Day 156 – Feels so good to be Mean.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the power of meanness is short lived and it serves no purpose.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have a birthright to be mean towards others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize being mean only fuels my ego and makes the illusion of ego more real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can get away with being mean and nasty towards others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, being mean is the easiest thing to do, while breathing and being considerate is hard to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, this mean game has only one end, which is disaster.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, meanness is result of accumulated thoughts and thinking which created the energy outflow manifesting as meanness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, long before meanness came about, it is the thoughts, the thinking that contributed to the outflow of meanness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, meanness is simply being inconsiderate towards others and thereby allowing words, actions and thoughts to be nasty towards others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never ask the why question: why does it feel good to be mean? in that I see being mean is way to make myself feel good at the cost of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, there is never any reason to be mean, simple direct conversation is sufficient to get my point across. Utilizing meanness in conversations is simply a nasty evil shitty thing to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify mean manner of speaking and actions towards others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, the mean one is the eventual loser, therefore I see being mean is self-abusive and self-destructive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to instead of speaking directly use meanness as way to communicate out of the fear of speaking directly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear speaking directly in putting my points on the table for the other party to see. in this I fear the reactions of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize, simply by breathing and engaging in physical activity, I could stop the urge to be mean within myself.

When and as I see myself plotting, planning, and thinking mean shit, I stop, I breathe, realizing that participating in mean thinking only compounds the energy and will manifest as outburst, therefore I stop, I breathe.

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