Day 352 – Some Self-forgiveness around trust.

self-forgivenessI forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to mistrust people. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will be ripped off, not seen/realizing mistrust is a form of paranoia, and a judgment. In this I see/realize I have to bring this point back to myself, where do I allow mistrust within myself? Do I trust myself?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to mistrust another because I know I cannot be trusted within the same point, and therefore I project it unto others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that everyone out there is going to rip me off, not seen/realizing this is a form of paranoia.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize trust begins with self-trust. And self-trust begins with self-intimacy, becoming intimate within myself through writing and self-awareness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being used, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am being used in the name of keeping a connection/friendship up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself not see/realize, self-intimacy is the key, becoming aware of myself, my breathing, being here, living here, NOT getting lost in the head.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize awareness of breathing is key to self-intimacy. If I am not even aware of my breathing, how can I be self-intimate? Breathing is very intimate yet I am not aware of it, therefore living as an automatic robot.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize every moment, every breath, every word I speak, every gesture, every comment I make, in fact everything I do, is a chance for self-awareness, and it is where this process is walked, in moment by moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize everything I do at work is a chance for self-correction/self-awareness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize LIFE is ONE, as I deal with everyone, I am dealing with LIFE, therefore I have a responsibility on how I direct the conversations, how I participate in my mind, I have a responsibility for what I accept and allow within me in each moment, I have a responsibility to breathe, and be here. I have a responsibility to walk this process in every breath. I mean, I either I do this FULLY or just vanish. This is not a part-time thing.

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