Day 387 – Mind is like a runaway truck, apply brakes by Breathing with Awareness (every now and then).

waterContinuing with ‘breathing with awareness’ point. This is something I tried today with some success, but the point is to make it a regular application. Breathe-in, hold, and breathe-out.  Lots of resistance to do that, or I will feel sleepy the moment I start breathe-with-awareness thing, I guess the mind is not liking it at all.

I commit myself to return again and again to breathe-with-awareness application. Because I see/realize even few application of this on a regular basis is the key, as it will grow.

I commit myself to return again and again to breathe-with-awareness application when and as I see myself having a moment like in waiting in line, or driving, or something routine activity. Basically I have to jump into this application throughout the day here and there. Because I see that breathing every breath with awareness has not been successful so the new plan is to do it often, frequently, like applying brakes to slow down a trunk. Have to return to it again and again throughout the day. Slowly but surely build up the frequency in breathing with awareness.

I recall listening in some eqafe interview where Anu suggested this as well, throughout the day, he suggest returning to breathing with awareness again and again. Cut down the mind again and again. I mean, what is the other alternative? Completely breathe every breath as an automatic robot, which is what I have been doing all my life. So the new plan is to place little brakes throughout the day, in that cut down the momentum of the mind like stopping a runaway truck.

Self-awareness grows as breathing-with-awareness grows. I mean lack self-awareness means there is no breathing with awareness either. They go hand in hand.

There are so many little moments throughout the day, waiting in line at the grocery, waiting in traffic, sitting on the toilet, watching TV, being put on hold while talking to some customer service agent, you know how it feels like while waiting for things, while waiting for people. So use that momentary time slot to breathe with awareness as a deliberate self-directed action. This is a workable plan for me I think, throughout the day, now I am committed to apply the brakes. Just like mind is growing in its momentum, I see/realize my application will assist in growing in self-awareness.

This is a handy little plan on how to tackle the automatic breathing problem. Because clearly breathing is an automatic robot thing which has not been helpful for me throughout my life. So I need a new plan.

I commit myself to throughout the day apply the brakes, meaning, breathe with awareness here and there.

I commit myself to throughout the day direct myself to breathe with awareness. Because I see/realize even few drops of this application can grow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that ‘breathing with awareness’ might turn me into a zombie who is living in a void, not seen/realizing it is the thinking that makes me a zombie.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that LIVING means THINKING, therefore I forgive myself for fearing to stop thinking because of the subtle fear that not thinking means not living. Not seen/realizing thinking is not living, because in thinking I am lost somewhere and not here as a physical being, like a tree.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to erroneously believe that to be human I must think and feel. Not seen/realizing thinking and feeling is what makes me a zombie.

So let’s start this breathing with awareness application plan. I commit myself to breathe with awareness throughout the day, as like applying brakes to stop the runaway truck.  

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