Day 425 – Reminding myself slow down.

waterbreathing. I direct myself to breathe and slow down, as I see/realize that I am rushing, allowing too many scenarios to run wild in my head. So I direct myself to breathe, slow down, chil-lax, as they say, take it easy, relax, and chill out a bit. Too much worry, too many what-ifs are not cool, in fact I am torturing myself and my body. SO when and as I see myself gone into the world of future worries, what-ifs, I stop, I breathe. when and as I see myself making stories about the future in my head, I stop, I breathe. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize, my home is here, in my body, I am here within my body, I am here. Not there, not over there, not in another city, not anywhere else, BUT HERE.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush, to live in the future imaginations. I slow down, i breathe, i bring myself back to here.

I see writing is a cool self support, and I have fallen behind a lot lately, lacking in self application. SO that’s another point I direct myself, to breathe, to slow down, to write every day. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let myself fall behind in self writing, i direct myself to utilize writing as a tool to self support myself. Here writing is not a home work, rather this is a self realization process. So I direct myself to breathe, slow down and get on with daily application of writing. As I see/realize I have let myself down in daily writing, this is something I MUST DO, its a daily regular, self cleansing writing activity.

I write myself to freedom, I forgive myself through writing, I see the issues in my head through writing, I see pros/cons of a decision point through writing, I write out my raging mind’s emotional waves in writing.

so the key point is slow down, breathe, get on with writing, slow down in judgment, slow down in blaming, instead seek to understand, slow down, breathe, less worry, less anxiety, less what-ifs, less imaginations, MORE HERE, breathe here, come here, be in the body, my body is my home.

I mean, I direct myself to stop the shake/bake going on within myself, I stop allowing myself to be rattled, I STOP, I breathe. I am my own power, I am my own authority.

I support myself by breathing, being here, by stopping self torture, by stopping what-ifs, more breathing, more HERE.

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Day 424: What I do unto myself, I do unto others also.

self-forgivenessI forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am frozen inside, not seen/realizing I am not frozen, its that I am not allowing myself to open up and freely mingle with people; this is a limitation I have imposed upon myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize I must give myself first, before others can give to me; if I am in a so-called ‘frozen’ state, others will perceive such and behave accordingly.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize what I give to myself others give to me too, and “what I do unto myself, I do unto another”.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize “what I do unto myself, I do unto others also”.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize if I am hard on myself, if I am difficult on myself, if I am judging and blaming myself, it is like I am doing the same to others also. This in turn reinforces my ‘frozen’ state by others, as I am ‘frozen’, I am freezing others too, hence they run away from me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize “as I do unto myself, I do unto others”, therefore I see/realize, all the nasty, mean shit I do unto me, I am also doing unto others, and WILL do unto others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize if I am always in a fearful/stressed out state of mind, obviously as I do that to me, I am doing it others, therefore naturally others will avoid me, in fearing of being done harm to them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize as I am in a frozen state, I am doing it to others too, hence they will run away from me, because they won’t like to be frozen.

Basically, if a person is  in a torturous self-state that will make it hard for others to mingle with him. But why? simply, what I do unto myself, I am doing it to others, and this others don’t like to be put on a torturous state, naturally. if I am comfortable with myself, then, yes, others will be comfortable with me too, as it takes them to state of comfort within themselves.

“As I do unto myself, I do unto others”. This is specially true with judgements, as I judge myself, as I condemn myself, as I hate myself, I DO IT TO OTHERS too, and obviously as I hate myself , I am/will hate others too.  SO the key is self-acceptance and self-forgiveness, and becoming comfortable with myself.

Time to accept myself, forgive myself, heal myself, study this video by the one and only Bernard Poolman.

When and as I see myself in a self-torturous state, I stop, I breathe, because I see/realize what I do unto myself, I am doing to ENTIRE LIFE, everything. What I do unto myself, I am doing it to every breathing thing. Now Imagine what a cruel thing to self-torture, because its not only for self, as what I do unto myself, I do unto ALL.

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