Day 481: Negative mornings, Positive evenings. This cycle must end.

stressed-womanI forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wake up with ‘negative feelings’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wake up with feelings of anger.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wake up with feelings wanting to show spitefulness/revenge.

I Forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wake up with feelings of betrayal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel bad in the mornings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to swing into the polar opposite of positive feelings in the mornings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike negative feelings and like positive feelings. in this I forgive myself for not seen/realizing that I am actually creating the negative feelings by ‘liking’ desiring the positive feelings in the evenings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize positive/negative feelings are polar opposites by liking one end, I am inevitably creating the other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike what I feel in the mornings and wanting it to end, not seen/realizing what I resist persist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist the negative feelings in the mornings instead of just breathing and let it go. I see/realize and understand that I cannot fight the feelings that are here, as there is no instant delete button, so the only self-help is breathing and not participating in this emotion/feeling/thoughts. And I see/realize walking the points through writing is the real delete button, though it’s a process, so I cannot rush myself to ‘feel good’, which is again desiring a positive feeling through walking this process. By desiring a positive result I am in fact creating a negative outcome. They go hand in hand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to regret the happy things I do in the evenings or happy decisions I conclude or happy things I say. In this I see/realize how I have created a positive-evening and negative-morning scenario for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize things I do out of ‘morning feelings states’ must be double-checked otherwise I may end up saying/doing nasty things creating unnecessary consequences for myself and others in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize all the ‘negative stuff’ I feel in the mornings are already created stuff just showing up now, so I must take the responsibility to write them out, clean them out, release them out. In this I see/realize I am the creator of them.

I Forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a tendency to ‘dump’ what I feel in the mornings onto others not seen/realizing the consequence it has on others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see my mornings states as ‘BAD’, as very bad, in that I Forgive myself for believing that something must be ‘wrong’ with me for me to feel ‘bad’ nearly every morning.

I Forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be happy in the mornings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be ‘positive’ in the mornings as counter-punch to what I am actually feeling in the mornings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate my morning states.

I Forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize my morning mind state is also a consequence of what I physically accept and allow: what time did I retire to bed? what time did I eat my dinner, what time did I get out of bed this morning, how much water did I drink, in this I see/realize physically I could ‘torture’ the body and as a result not feeling so great in the mornings. The body is not a machine, it needs support, care and comfort for cool operations, and therefore by I see/realize my ‘morning negatives’ indicate that I need to care for the body more. Can’t goto bed at 2am and expect to be ‘feeling positive’ at 7am, its common sense, support the body, the body supports you.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize my craving/desire/indulgence for positive feelings create the morning negative feelings. within I see/realize when and as I am ‘feeling positive’ its a red-flag indicating slowly but surely the negative polar opposite will manifest.

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