Day 526: Why so hard to relax?

waterI forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that its hard for me to relax.

I forgive myself for making self-relaxation difficult and I forgive me for believing that others have to help me relax.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that when I am stressed out its very hard for me to clam down and relax. I see how these nonsense ideas have limited me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deny myself self-relaxation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I must have the right people around me to give me support sort of baby-sit me so that I can relax myself. In this I forgive myself for not taking the self-responsibility to relax myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel angry with people when I am not relaxed or stressed out believing they are part of the reasons why I am stressed out, within this I forgive myself for wanting to blame others, whoever is around me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make relaxation a difficult task, instead of simply breathing just returning to my physical body through breath, in that way letting the tensed up energy go away.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel a sense of depression when I am stressed out and not relaxed. Within this I forgive myself for believing that I am anti-social and that I can’t mix and mingle with anybody.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear socializing with people when I feel I am not relaxed, within this I forgive myself for believing that others don’t like me when I am all tensed up and not relaxed, not seeing/realizing that I don’t like myself in that state either.

I forgive myself for not embracing myself when I am tensed up or not relaxed.

I forgive myself for beating myself up with mental torture as to pile up more tension causing self-relaxation to be difficult.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make relaxation difficult for myself by participating in my mind thinking shit about others.

I forgive myself for believing that I can easily get tensed up and not relaxed.

I forgive myself for fearing a state of self-relaxation.

When and as I see myself feeling not relaxed, or tensed up, I stop participating in the mind and direct myself to breathe, and be here, in that way I see that build up energy will go away.

When and as I see myself feeling not relaxed, and/or tensed up, I stop blaming others for it, and stop being angry with others, I see/realize my tension/non-relaxation is largely due to my own participation in my mind. So I breathe and be here. 

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