Facing a writer’s block. Always nice to return to breathing, in-breath, pause, out-breath. That’s basically the definition of a Moment, the space between in and out breath. Obviously if I am not here in every ‘Moment’, then the question is: where am I? Which means I have loads of things to write about, all my alternative realities, personalities, fears, worries, what-ifs, daydreams, are all points to write. So to say I am facing a wall about what to write is not entirely true, I guess I am looking for a cool topic. Well there is nothing cool to write about, I mean, writing in itself is cool, but no cool topics as such. However not participating in the mind in each ‘Moment’ is cool indeed.
Today I was relaxing for a moment, sitting down comfortably, I noticed myself breathing, in and out, moving all the way towards the belly and back, it was nice to slow down, by getting real down (with in-breath). Couldn’t continue for too long on that, as my mind had other plans, so started thinking. So many urgent stuff to think about and experience feelings towards them. Its like simply not enough to just be here, just breathing, in and out, seems that’s not enough; have to think, have to imagine, have to daydream, have to recall memories, have to project and then go onto blame/fear/regrets etc; the mind will want to do them, but “I” can decide NOT to participate in them, NOT to continue with the thought-train, I mean, it’s upto me. Either, I participate in the thought-train and create loads of emotions OR I stop participation and direct myself to breathe, in and out. Yes today I noticed how I STOP and didn’t allow myself to jump into the thought-train, as if I had a living self-corrective script and I simply followed it. This is cool as I was able to stop some nasty things spinning out of control within my mind. I was able to NOT go there. No need to, it’s just the mind throwing shit at me to dwell on.
Living the principle of what is best for all, and realizing my full potential starts with me STOPPING my mind participation. I mean if I can’t take the responsibility to stop my own mind, then, I am not supporting myself, and so effectively cannot support anybody else. Self-responsibility to watch the mind, watch the movements, breathe, be here, directing self to STOP riding the thought-train. These are the basics of desteni message, first taking responsibility for one’s own mind. I mean changing the world is a big job if one cannot stop one’s mind, no wonder people don’t’ take the notion of changing the world seriously, because they know, it must start with them changing their own minds, which is rather difficult.
I commit myself to walk this basic step of self-responsibility, to STOP my mind, in all ways and always. As I see/realize without this basic step, change is a long journey indeed.
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