day 647: more on taking things personally

momThe question is very simple, if I am going to react to so-called evil, then how on earth will I stand for solutions? Be it in personal life or in global space, reacting to evil doesn’t bring any solutions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in anger when I perceive a situation as ‘evil done unto me’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel very dis-empowered when I saw a situation as ‘great evil and unjust’ done unto me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge this person as evil, the doer of unjust to me. And within that I forgive myself for seeing myself as a victim who fell so down and low by the mighty deliberations of this person. I forgive myself for not seeing/realizing because I take everything so personally in that I allowed myself to feel dis-empowered.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to still take things so personally, to the point where I physically experience tension, depression and even to the point of breaking down internally (all because I take things personally).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize it was not done personally unto me, rather the person is living out his own mind-pattern, and nothing to do with me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself take criticisms very personally instead of looking at the learning potentials in criticism.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to view this person as evil because of his criticism of my work, in that I forgive myself for being stubborn and unwilling to listen to him unconditionally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge those who criticize my work as intellectual bullies, whose sole purpose is to find out what’s wrong with my work instead of looking at whats correct about my work. Within this I forgive myself for desiring positive pat-on-the-back for my work, and totally hate it when my work is scrutinized/reviewed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear criticism.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear criticism believing they can break me down. In this I forgive myself for fearing the memories of my childhood where criticism was unbounded and pat-on-the-back were non-existent. Within this I forgive myself for instinctively fear whenever any criticism is given about my work. As if I resonantly activate fear and resistance to questions/comments about the quality of my work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience a sense of emotional torture and mild form of break down within myself when my work is criticized and commented upon.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to step into a war mood with those who complain or criticize my work, within this I forgive myself for believing that everyone is against me, and I am the lone victim. I forgive myself for seeing myself as a victim, and in that actually experience myself as a victim.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think “but other don’t’ get the same kind of criticism about their submissions, only I get them”, within I forgive myself for thinking like a victim, ‘they are only after me’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for giving me criticism about my work, instead of looking to learn something from it, or at least have another perspective on it.

I forgive myself for being nasty and spiteful towards people when they criticize my work to the point where me desiring to have them sacked.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to carry memories as a child where criticism of me and my work or anything I ever did for that matter was subject to ridicule and criticism, within this I forgive myself for carrying that energy where I feel threatened by criticism as if my very life is on the line.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being cut off from everyone when my work is criticized.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to carry the memories of where ‘nothing I ever did was good enough’, and was constantly criticized, within this I forgive myself for fearing the very word ‘criticism’. I forgive myself for connecting the emotion of fear and abandonment to the word ‘criticism’. In that I see how I activate fear of death basically when anyone criticize my work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate those who criticize my work, within that I forgive myself for believing that they must really hate me to criticize my work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear dying. I forgive myself for fearing that criticism of my work could lead to premature death, torture, isolation and humiliation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear receiving suggestions or feedback or critics from others about my work, within that I forgive myself for fearing death, as if any critic of my work would lead me to die.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that everyone is out there to get me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to carry a victim mentality and within that actually create such life experiences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to view somebody as ‘overly critical’ and within that wanting to be spiteful towards them, instead understanding and being patient when such patterns are played out by others, and if anything my reactions shows how I am carrying the same patterns of being ‘overly critical’.

So this is something I have to closely observe in me and stop the pattern activation. When and as I see myself reacting to criticism of my work, I stop I breathe. When and as I see myself being reactive and fearful when others criticize my work, I stop I breathe. I ground myself here in breathing. I direct myself to be completely open to the comments/criticisms given by others, and look to learn from it, and if there is nothing learn from their observations, at least learn to not react and be spiteful. Because I see/realize even though some may like an evil behave in an overly critical hash manner devoid of any kindness in their criticism, I see/realize that me reacting to their apparent evilness wont’ assist them. I am here walking this process for myself and also for others, at least my walking should an example for others to learn something from, then an evil hash fellow can learn a bit about kindness, non-reactiveness. In that who knows, the next time he might share his observations in a gentler manner, not so hash as it is now, but if I keep on attacking and demonize him for his patterns, it can be assured we will only have more of the same. Sort of reinforcing the evil every time you attack it.

Investigate solutions:

Desteni.org – Participate in Forums or Search Desteni Material.
Living Income Guaranteed – An Economic Solution.
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with Self Support.
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey.
Eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews to Self Perfection.
Equal Life Foundation – Facebook Stream for Unfolding Events.
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
The master of war – “Be a Cure, not a Disease”.
You’re me in another Life – by Bernard Poolman
#livingincomeguaranteed

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