Tag Archives: awareness

day 643: Oh Leader my God!!!

modiLiving the principle of equality is a real-time test for me within group settings. Time and again I have found that I treat some like gods within the group while others get nothing. Obviously that’s not equality. The tendency for ‘clique mentality’ is still there despite having suffered from it and dislike being treated like an outsider by other cliques. Also I am looking here how I have a tendency to suck up to leaders within a group from the starting point of wanting to be liked by them or form some special connections with them just because of their position. Even though I have written about this before, the pattern still exist and bothers me. Like Bernard mentioned once, ‘write 100 times if you have to till you correct it’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suck up to leaders within group context while completely ignoring those who are on the sidelines.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek the special attention from leaders.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience sense of discomfort and fear when speaking with the leaders.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be at unease when I am speaking with leaders.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience physical unease when I am speaking with leaders one to one, as if I am in fear and paranoia.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sometimes act very polite and cool when I am with leaders just to be liked by them, within this I forgive myself for acting out personalities while I am facing leaders.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize leadership is a job or an assignment within the world system, with the power of the system being assigned to them, so essentially by sucking upto leaders I am showing how much fear I have of the world system. I mean if I were to see the same person in a homeless shelter begging for food, would I show the same unease and physical discomfort while in their presence? No, goes to show the power of the system that I have allowed and accepted to control me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to worship and fear the power of the system and those who carry that system-power within them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear X, I forgive myself for playing out a GURU-devotee like role while dealing with X, I forgive myself for playing out a master-slave role, within this I forgive myself for fear being disliked hence outcast from the group by X.

I forgive myself for not asking the question: why can’t I be here equal with myself hence equal with all that is here without any special considerations for anyone?

I forgive myself for not seeing/realizing though I have given up trust in god, but I still fear the god-like people in the system with power.

I forgive myself for fearing GOD-like people in the system with power of GOD allotted to them by the system.

I forgive myself for sucking upto GOD-like leaders in the group.

I forgive myself for fear being kicked out by the GOD-likes.

I forgive myself for fear being not liked by the GOD-like people in the system.

I forgive myself for treating X like a GOD-like.

I forgive myself for ignoring all others because my focus is on the leaders wanting/seeking/needing and desiring their sole attention.

I forgive myself for not being here as breath, as the silence of the breath, here breathing within myself, in that I am not looking for anything or anyone outside of myself, as I am constantly establishing my-self-equality.

I see/realize lack of self-equality is the reason why I suck upto other GODs, because I am not equal and one within myself. I am not here as breath, breathing, with the focus and attention within myself, rather I am stuck looking/desiring/wanting the attention of the leaders, in that play out various tricks to get their attention. If I am totally and entirely within myself as breath and breathing with my physical body awareness, all and everything here will be at equal distance to me, hence in equal intimacy to me, because I am self-intimate with myself, as within, so without, one cannot be intimate with others without self-intimacy. Lack of self-intimacy what manifest as sucking upto others, because I am trying fill myself through others, specially through leaders, those god-likes among us.

I forgive myself for not giving myself the key to freedom, self-intimacy, breathing, breath, here as equal and one with my physical body.

When and as I speak/deal with leaders here, just me and other physical bodies, we are already equal and one as the physical, in that I see only the mind can tell me that some are more GOD-like than others, some are more worthy than others etc, in that worshiping some and discarding others silently. So when the mind stops there is self-equality naturally, hence equality with all others naturally. Cool.

When and as I see myself in a group setting, or in one to one dealing with leaders those who are the GOD-likes in the system, I stop I breathe and remain breathing within myself, making sure I am within myself, within my body-awareness, not gone into my head looking for the attention from the gods. I am here in the body, in that, I am equal to myself and to all, equally.

Investigate solutions:

Desteni.org – Participate in Forums or Search Desteni Material.
Living Income Guaranteed – An Economic Solution.
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with Self Support.
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey.
Eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews to Self Perfection.
Equal Life Foundation – Facebook Stream for Unfolding Events.
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
The master of war – “Be a Cure, not a Disease”.
#livingincomeguaranteed

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day 642: From a scary mind to Life force where all is Equal

HumanI just listened to an awesome interview by eqafe titled ‘stuck in coma – part 8′. I suggest everyone listen to this. Here a Being from the hereafter speaks about ‘life-force’ that is equal in all of us, which is currently at a dormant state but slowly awakening. This awakening can only happen as “I get to know myself, my mind”, and there are no shortcuts. Have to know your mind in grand detail, hence this journey to life process, the desteni-I-Process, desteni-I-Process-lite etc etc, are all to support and assist to ‘get to know thyself, thymind’, within that enabling the re-birthing of that ‘real life force/source’.

This so-called life force has been always here but dormant, and now for the ‘longest time’, it’s awakening through us as we walk this process/journey to life. This is the re-birthing process. Why is this important? Well, for one, we will begin to see each other as ourselves and that will move us to create a world that is best for all. I mean once that ‘equality and oneness’ is recognized, it’s a whole new life. Also, you cannot rush to re-birthing, there is no quick way, no fast track for the rich and the famous, you still have to write your shit out, and walk your mind in details. And certainly there are no “I found Jesus”, or “I am saved” moments in this process, you have to put in the hard-work to get to know thymind as thyself. You could say this is the greatest purpose to life, to walk a process to birth self as real life source, in that enabling the birthing of a new world that is best for all.

I mean we have piled up enough shit on this earth for a long time now, all that must come to an end, this abuse simply cannot continue. So us changing ourselves, re-birthing ourselves is not a spiritual goal like those who are searching for enlightenment or nirvana, we change ourselves to create a world that is best for all, as within so without. So this eqafe interview is extremely important, I mean it will remind you of your own full life potential, you’re not just a scary mind walking around which is what you’re now, with your real life force dormant, awaiting to awoken up as yourself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear and resist walking my mind out in great detail. 

I forgive myself to fear getting to know myself as my mind in that sort of hide and pretend while a great potential of life is awaiting for me, as me. Within this I see/realize currently I am not even alive, I can’t say ‘I am life’, if anything I am a total system, a scary mind walking around just trying to survive in this dog eat dog world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize this life force is equal in all of us, hence our potential is equal, its only matter of accessing it through walking a lengthy process to get to know thyself.

Here is a chance to get to know myself as that life source, as that life force, yet I deny that to myself and continue to live the life of a scary mind, I mean that doesn’t make sense. Because I am pre-programmed to live in separation from myself, and from others, I am designed to live like a scary mind. So it will take an extensive process of daily writing, DIP writings etc etc to unwrap the mind in its grand details. In that birthing myself over time, the full potential of me as real-life source/force. This is already visible in some people who are walking this process, you can see bits of new life potential within them emerging (as per the Being via the portal who observed this).

Bernard is a being who embodied this life force/source to a greater degree if not entirely as to my observation. Perhaps that’s why in the presence of Bernard there is a sense of oneness/equality and ease, I mean this is remarkable and noted by so many. Bernard has shown the absolute potential for us all by living and walking among us as the way he did, and his written and recorded words still continue to support us. So I suggest giving that eqafe interview a short, its pretty cool to be reminded of our potential, this journey, the purpose of this journey etc, here the purpose/goal is not an achievement point like those that are promoted in the world system or religious systems, rather as living and realizing this full life potential that is here for us all equally as ourselves.

So back to myself yes always back to myself. I commit myself to walk my mind, to get to know myself, I realize my time is in short supply (i.e. death is always around the corner), so while I am still here in my physical body, I realize wasting my time in mundane things is stupid, so I direct myself to get to know myself as my mind in great details, in that enabling my re-birthing process. I realize the self-realization of equality and oneness is only possible when I re-birth myself as that life-force/source, but for now as a scary mind ‘equality and oneness’ is only an idea for me, nothing more.

I mean how awesome is it to realize that everyone and everything here is of the same life force/source as you. Then will war, rape, murder, starvation, unemployment, homelessness, poverty, abuse, animal slaughter ever be possible? Will you rape another as yourself? Will you kill another as yourself? We are living in an insane world right now, because all of us are scary minds, running around like little shit-heads in fear, shooting and killing each other in separation from each other, while a real life source/force exist within us all equally. So cool, check it out, don’t’ miss out on your own life potential here/now, or you might to have wait till your life-review to realize this, which might be bit too late.

Investigate solutions:

Desteni.org – Participate in Forums or Search Desteni Material.
Living Income Guaranteed – An Economic Solution.
DIP Lite – Free Online Course to get you started with Self Support.
DIP PRO -A Desteni Course for those Ready to Walk the Journey.
Eqafe.com – Invest in a wide range of Interviews to Self Perfection.
Equal Life Foundation – Facebook Stream for Unfolding Events.
Creations Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
Heavens Journey To Life 7 Year Process Blogs
The master of war – “Be a Cure, not a Disease”.
#livingincomeguaranteed